Your firstborn will not remember
the organic food you stressed over,
or the hours spent crafting Pinterest-worthy Ramadan activities.
He won’t recall the spotless floors,
the organized minimal pantry,
the handmade playdough, or the carefully selected wooden Montessori toys.
He won’t remember the late-night Googling about vaccines and screens,
the endless scrolls through mom blogs,
or how long you debated what school to choose.
He won’t remember
how many times you swallowed your scream,
or how hard you worked to serve his meals with a smile
when you were running on empty.
He won’t remember the perfect potty seat,
the essential oil blends for colds
the BPA-free sippy cups,
or how you tried so hard to protect him from every toxin.
He won’t remember the elaborate parties at five
with cupcakes that matched the theme.
But here’s what he will remember:
He will remember you.
Your face.
Your voice.
Your presence.
He’ll remember how you sighed while plating his food
because you were burnt out but trying anyway.
He’ll remember when you handed him the phone
just to buy a moment of silence at the restaurant.
He’ll remember that you were there but distracted.
That you took pictures of the activity
before ever sitting down to do it.
He’ll remember
how you scrolled,
and he wandered,
and the playdough crusted over
without much play with mom.
He’ll remember the screens, the quiet moments,
the tension in the air when things felt off between you and Baba.
He’ll remember feeling it all without knowing why.
But do you know what else he’ll remember?
He’ll remember how you tucked him in
with hug and duʿā’s you recited from the heart
until he memorized them himself.
He’ll remember how you sat by the door
when he was scared to sleep alone.
How you showed him how to shower
when he was too embarrassed to ask.
He’ll remember the rhythm of your days—
how his world felt safe in your routines.
He’ll remember the masjid trips, the chore songs,
the Friday treats and the kisses when no one was looking.
He’ll remember how you reminded him
that Allah loves him more than you’ll ever do.
That he is never alone,
even when you’re not there to hold his hand.
He’ll remember that when he sneezed,
you taught him to say Alḥamdulillāh.
That you corrected inauthentic Prophet stories cartoons on YouTube
because you cared more about truth than convenience.
He’ll remember that you stood up for him at school
when his Islam wasn’t understood.
That you made the hard call
to put him somewhere his faith could flourish,
even when the cost was high.
He’ll remember your strength.
Your softness.
Your sacrifices.
He’ll remember that you gave him
the deepest gift a mother can give:
A love for Allah and knowledge of Him that was seeded from childhood.
Dear Mama, we spend so much time
obsessing over what they eat,
what they wear,
what they play with.
But most of those things—they won’t remember 12 years from now.
So here’s your reminder:
Focus on what lasts.
Focus on the soul.
Focus on the moments that plant something real.
Because when the years pass—and they will—
what remains is not the playroom or the Pinterest board or the Instagram pictures.
What remains is your connection to each other through the deen of Allah swt.
With love,
Future you.
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What’s brewing in the Elite community?
1- After hearing your requests for years, I am finally putting together the ultimate parenting program for Muslims moms raising kids from 0-12. Join here.
2- Check out the new pop-up podcast. Click here to listen!
Until next time, Take care
Assalamu Alekum.