Eid Mubarak!
It's the morning of Eid and we're all decked out in our finest clothing. We hurry up out the door for Eid prayer, when suddenly we have this pit in our stomach. We become a bit anxious because our children are looking gorgeous as ever. So as our spouses and our siblings, and we have this small fear that we might be attracting the evil eye to ourselves.
We quickly, read, Ayatul Kursi. We spit it in the air, over the kids and our spouses for protection. Sometimes we say things like "say mashallah" to others when we feel suspicious that they might be admiring us a little too hard.
As Muslims, we're constantly walking on a fine line between wanting to share our blessings, but at the same time, fearing the evil eye ever since we learned that it is real because the Prophet (saw) told us "The evil eye is real. And if anything were to overtake the divine decree, it would be the evil eye." Narrated by Al-Tirmithi
May Allah protect us. Ameen.
But contrary to popular belief, the evil eye isn't always evil. It's not always rooted in jealousy and hatred, and sometimes it can actually stem from a place of complete and deep admiration. I don't mean to scare you, but this can mean that we can give our loved ones, like our kids, our spouses, those whom we love unconditionally, and even ourselves, the “eye.”
Here are the four main categories should know about when it comes to the evil eye.
Ayn - Admiration from someone who may know and love you and does not have evil intentions towards you. So they look at you in awe without remembering Allah.
Hasad - Envy from someone who dislikes you or something you possess and wants it removed from you.
Nafs - Self-admiration which a person can put “ain” on themself.
Nathara - The evil eye which comes from the Jinn.
So what can we do to protect ourselves from the evil eye?
I want to share with you a few important actions that we can take that'll help us ward off harm from the evil eye.
The first thing is remembering that the evil eye does not have power over Allah's protection.
Sometimes as Muslims, we can really go off the rails with the whole concept of the evil eye. When we take proper measures in protecting ourselves with the words of Allah SWT, we must believe that the word of Allah SWT will always overpower the harm that the eye can cause.
Aside from that, it's important that we practice the notion of praying for the blessings of others, sincerely.
We typically say Mashallah TabarakAllah for things that belong to us and Allahuma Barek Lahum or Allahuma Barek for the blessings that other people possess.
But the goal as always is to say it with a present heart. The Prophet (saw) said, "Whoever among you see something in himself or in his possessions or in his brother that he likes, let him pray for blessing for it because the evil eye is real."
The second thing is to religiously practice reciting the morning and evening supplications every single day. Sometimes we may be a little lazy, and we put on a YouTube video so that we're passively listening to it.
With the idea that somehow if these words are read in the house, it’ll suffice. To truly benefit from the protection of these supplications as they were intended, we have to recite them with understanding, presence, and conviction that Allah SWT will protect us against all harm.
The third thing is to be mindful of what we share both online and offline. I know as human beings, we have this urge to share because we are social beings. We want to share the beautiful blessings of Allah SWT. But the sad reality is it always comes with a cost, especially when we share with people that we don't know, i.e., social media. I do believe that it's better to reserve these cherished blessings to yourself and celebrate them in private spaces.
To take it further, we learned this concept from none other than Prophet Yaqoub (AS), who said when he actually told his son Yusuf to conceal his dream of prophecy from his brothers. So can you imagine when we share our blessings, and sometimes we even flaunt it on places like social media? You have to understand that not everybody on social media means well for you.
There are a lot of people with issues who are watching the things that you're posting, so I would say to be very careful and mindful about the things that you post online, the things that you talk about, just so that you can add a layer of protection after seeking it from Allah SWT.
“Please note that using emulates is considered a form of shirk.”
The beautiful thing about our religion is that it always has a right way of doing things, even when it comes to things like jealousy and envy. For example, we're encouraged to pray for others' blessings and to pray for something better when we feel envious towards one another.
This is what's referred to as Ghipta. It's when we admire other people's success, blessings, and achievements while wishing for something similar or better, without harboring any ill feelings towards that person, for them to lose what they have. It doesn't involve malice or a desire for harm. It actually motivates us to strive for success and seek Allah's blessings.
The goal of this kind of good envy is to express admiration, appreciation, and gratitude while attributing all sources of goodness, beauty, and success to Allah SWT. And it starts with particular phrases that we learned such as "Mashallah TabarakAllah," "Allahuma Barek."
These phrases serve multiple purposes, that we may not be paying attention to. The first one being the protection from the evil eye. When we admire something or someone, and we say "Mashallah TabarakAllah," "Allahuma Barek," "Lahwla Wala Quwata Illa Billah," it helps ward off the evil eye.
The second thing is that it helps us avoid the feeling of envy and jealousy because we acknowledge that all these blessings came from Allah SWT, and we all have equal access to Him.
So now the question begs: how can we teach our children to lead their life with Ghipta?
I believe it begins with how we parent them and the language we use. So whenever we give them something they like, we need to remind them that it all came from Allah SWT and not from us. For instance, when we gifted them goodies and money during Eid, it was our duty to remind them that it all came from Allah the most merciful.
Another thing that we can teach our children is to learn the dua'a for personal admiration. For example, when we look at ourselves in the mirror, we say "Allahuma Ahsin Khuluqi Kama Hasanta Khalqi" or "Ahsanta Khuluqi." Oh Allah, beautify my character as you have beautified me.
And the most important thing is to make sure our children can define and become aware of when jealousy is happening. So that they can be equipped to handle it in a way that supports their Islamic identity.
Shaming jealousy or shaming them into gratitude when jealousy occurs does not work for anyone's favor.
We want to educate our children about what to do when jealousy happens, based on the Sunnah of the Prophet (SAW), and we want to give them the tools and the language they need to navigate it with confidence and not shame.
Lastly, we can revisit the stories of the Prophets like the Sons of Adam or the Brothers of Yusuf. Let us highlight how jealousy can lead to bad choices if we don't learn to tame it in accordance to teachings of Allah and His prophet (saw). This will help children and give a sense of perspective when it comes to these types of feelings.
Since we just came out of Eid and all its celebrations, I wanted to remind myself and you about these practices and the methodologies that we have been taught by the prophet (saw) to ward off the evil eye from each other and our loved ones.
And with that being said, I would love it if you could pass down this podcast/newsletter episode to a fellow friend who might benefit from it.
I'll talk to you guys next week. Take care. Assalamu Alaikum.
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